I sound like a broken record because my mind is a broken record. Utter despair that’s only broken up by fear and the leads me go into a rage.

That’s what PTSD looks like. Over and over and over and over again.

My life is a mess. I’m all alone. I’ve been humiliated and victimized.

I’m sad.

I’m in debt over legal fees. Cops and/or former coworkers are commenting on my blog. Former employer and police are looking for any excuse to arrest me again. They’re trying to time it right so I lose my sick leave (and possibly my life). Or find some other way.

I’m afraid.

How dare they make me feel afraid. I hope they suffer torture over and over again. I hope the cunts drown in misery. I want the power to completely destroy them. The cops, the prosecutor, my employer, all of them destroyed me and I need to have retirbution. I can’t let them get away with this. I’m tired of them making me feel afraid.

I’m angry.

But what does it matter? My life is over anyway. And no one gave a damn.

I’m sad.